Bertie Bott's Bean Bonanza

12 years ago I stumbled upon a new kind of candy while perusing the aisles at Target. Based on one of the treats fictional characters Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger purchase at Honeydukes Sweetshop, Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans look like Jelly Belly candies (and are made by the Jelly Belly company) but taste like your worst nightmares. Yes, approximately half of the beans, with flavors like banana, blueberry, and watermelon, go down smoothly. But the rest of the beans taste like dirt, booger, soap, and dog food and just might make you vomit. Oh, wait…there's a bean for that too.

Let's pause for a moment to consider what must go into creating a piece of candy that tastes like vomit...

When I gifted him his very first box of beans, Tom's excitement mirrored Will's when he received his Nintendo 3DS from Santa last Christmas. Tom had no idea the beans even existed, but as soon as he laid eyes on the box's Flavor Guide the wheels in his head began to spin. Just weeks later, Tom unveiled his first and most basic version of "The Bean Game" to friends at a campus party.

The rules were simple. Without looking, player #1 dumped one bean from the box into his hand. (If more than one bean escaped the box, player #1 put all but one of the beans back inside, again without looking. The punishment for looking was eating a second bean on that turn.) Then, player #1 compared his bean to the pictures in the Flavor Guide and announced the flavor to the group. Tasty flavors like lemon drop, tutti fruitti, and cinnamon were met with "awww, man!" and "lucky!", while disgusting flavors like sardine, grass, and earwax were met with "YES!!", "AWESOME!", and "I've never been so happy in all my life!". To wish a vomit bean on your opponents was part of the game, and let's just say that Tom played the game well.

After player #1 finished eating his bean, he passed the box to person on his left. The process repeated itself until all of the beans had been eaten.

You're probably thinking, what kind of deranged idiot would play such an distasteful (pun intended) game?! You'd be surprised. Over the years, Tom charmed hundreds of people - parents, grandparents, siblings, cousins, friends, enemies, wedding guests, and strangers at bars - into participating in The Bean Game.

Tom also uses a version of The Bean Game as a wager when betting against his brothers, sister, friends, and wife. My alma mater football team beat your alma mater football team? You eat a bean. I beat you at Uno? You eat a bean. I skunked you in Cribbage? You eat a bean. He may be a gentleman from time to time, but never when it comes to The Bean Game.

This particular game of Uno-turned-Bean Game became so disgusting
that I had to "chase" my beans with mini donuts. See that tub of donuts
in front of me? By the time the game concluded I'd eaten Every. Single.
One. That's nearly as gross as (or grosser than?) eating vomit beans.

Over time Tom adapted The Bean Game to accommodate changes in bean manufacturing and to fulfill his desire to make the game more challenging. One of the newer rules, for example, is "no face, no chase", meaning that if a player makes a face or needs a chaser after eating a bad bean, they have to eat a second bean. Thank goodness "no face, no chase" was not yet in place during the above-mentioned Uno game.

Poor Will lost to Tom at Cribbage. Here he's trying not to let his daddy
see the tears in his eyes as he struggles to swallow his dog food bean.

The Bean Game plays favorites. Certain individuals - Tom's sister, Jenna, in particular - suffer tremendously, while Tom almost always emerges from the game unscathed. This unfair advantage becomes obvious to all who play with Tom, and over the years many have suspected him of somehow altering the game so that his taste buds receive the least amount of punishment. As payback, we've tried a number of different tactics - like hiding beans in his birthday cupcakes - to get him to accidentally eat a vomit bean. All have proved unsuccessful.

Tom somehow ate around the beans we'd hidden in his cupcake.

Tom, annoyingly confident as he prepares to eat his bean...

…and annoyingly jubilant after realizing it tasted like strawberry jam.

Over Christmas break Tom made a bet with his friend Tim about the Iowa Hawkeyes vs. LSU Tigers bowl game. If the Hawkeyes won, Tim would eat five beans; if the Tigers won, Tom would eat five beans. I rooted for the Hawkeyes with all my heart, but a tiny piece of me rejoiced when the Tigers came out on top because I really wanted Tom to have to eat five - hopefully bad - beans.

The fateful five.

Preparing for bean #2 (bean #1 tasted like banana). Please excuse Tom's
too-tight shirt - it's mine, and I can't quite remember why he was wearing it.

Dog food, baby.

After all these years, The Bean Game finally turned its back on its creator. And that's alright, because I think The Bean Game's creator is about ready to pass the torch to the next generation.

After years of watching the game play out and perfecting his own "poker face", Will's ready to take the helm. He skunked his Grandpa while playing Cribbage and insisted that Grandpa eat a bean, and then a couple of weeks ago we introduced a few of his friends to the beans. He may be a gentleman from time to time - he may even hold an umbrella over her head and carry her backpack from time to time - but when Kaylee agreed to play The Bean Game Will couldn't resist yelling "no face, no chase!" while she chewed her booger bean. Like father, like son.

High Five for Friday (1.31.14)

1. "Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions." I must have repeated this phrase - in my head or quietly under my breath - 100 times this week. Doing so actually worked, at least more so than I expected, and helped me bring my stress level back down to a dull roar.

2. Remember the "snowman" (named Olaf, of course) Hallie built while on vacation in Nebraska?

She and I smiled when we saw this more-recent picture…proof that Hallie's Grandma and Grandpa have taken good care of Olaf in her absence.

3. I never tire of military reunion videos, especially those - like this one - that highlight a parent reuniting with a child. I can't imagine spending such a long period of time away from my children, and I extend my deepest thanks to those who leave their families behind to serve our country.

4. This boy makes me smile, even more so now that when he's happy, a gaping hole - where his front baby tooth used to live - smiles back at me.

5. And last but not least, this SlightlyViral.com post, which provides readers with 23 perfectly accurate and perfectly hilarious examples of why women live longer than men, will surely provide you with a good laugh.

Happy Friday, friends!

Linking up with High Five for Friday here.

Currently: January 2014

Oops. It's been four months since I wrote a "Currently: A Month in the Life" post, so please bear with me as I ease back in...

Listening
To all things Sound of Music. I lit the match back in December when I let Hallie watch NBC's live presentation, and then I fueled the fire by adding the soundtrack to her Christmas list and the DVD to our movie library during an after-Christmas shopping trip. The CD now plays on repeat in my car, not so much because I adore the musical, but because both Will and Hallie have fallen head over heels for Maria, Friedrich, Marta, and the rest of the Von Trapp family. They especially love that the music includes parts written specifically for children, and have worked tirelessly (no really, they have - last Monday Will told me he planned to refrain from speaking for the remainder of the day because his jaw ached from singing "Do(e) a Deer" so many times) to learn these parts. As we drive along, I sing Maria's part, the kids sing the children's parts, and Tom puts his hands over his ears because we sound nothing like the Von Trapp Family Singers.

She only sings when the children sing and dances when the children dance. It's clear we have a little work to do if she's going to make it on Broadway, starting with clearing up her head cold and teaching her to correctly pronounce the letter "r".

Eating
Nothing of which I should be proud. It's a shame I didn't include "eat more bread and cheese" on my list of 2014 New Year's Resolutions, because if I had, I'd be knocking that resolution out of the park. I did resolve to eat cleaner, which I think I've done…if you overlook the Tillamook white cheddar and Texas Roadhouse rolls (damn you, Rock Prairie Elementary School fundraiser) that have regularly made their way onto my dinner plate.

Speaking of New Year's Resolutions, part of my commitment to eating cleaner involved baking my own bread. I bought a new-to-me bread machine at the beginning of the month and have used it three times - with positive results - thus far. Success, right? Nope. My bread may be cleaner, but I'm just eating more of it.

Drinking
Less Blue Moon. While in Arkansas for Thanksgiving, my cousin and her boyfriend introduced Tom and me to Redd's Strawberry Ale. After helping them quickly finish off the six-pack they'd purchased earlier that day (and then apologizing and restocking their supply as soon as we ventured out of the dry county in which my grandma lives for a grocery store run), we added Redd's Strawberry and Apple Ales to our regular shopping list. I am and always will be a Blue Moon girl, but my taste buds have appreciated mixing things up a bit.

Super cute, right?

Wearing
The most glorious camel-colored leather jacket, which I mentioned wanting in my "Currently: September" post. Now, thanks to my generous mom, I own one. The soft, supple leather and smooth liner feel luxurious, the color is gorgeous, and the cut is flattering, and I love that the jacket coordinates with nearly everything in my closet. And as it turns out, most of the time a leather jacket is all "winter weather" in Texas really calls for...

Feeling
A little of this, a little of that. Settling back into our daily routine of school, work, extracurricular activities, and sports brought me a great deal of peace after our holiday travels. Then Tom's work schedule spun that peace on its head, because caring for the kids without even an occasional break leaves me mentally drained but emotionally charged. My heart hurts for two loved ones going through difficult times, but my spirit was lifted when another loved one's struggle all but resolved itself in the best possible way. It's the ups and down that make life worth living, right?

Weather
First half of the month: the best. The absolute best. After spending Christmas vacation "basking" in temperatures that made life more than 10 feet from the fireplace unbearable, returning home to a spring-like Texas January felt heavenly.

Second half of the month: the worst. And not because we tasted bitter cold (by Texas standards) and experienced a few rainy mornings. I won't go into it, but in a nutshell, I don't deal well with people who don't deal well with less-than-perfect weather. (I'm not trying to insult anyone here - I acknowledge that my issues are my issues.) I love rain and snow and clouds, but at this point I find myself wishing for sun just so I won't have to worry about whether or not my kids can go to school.

Wanting
New sunglasses. I broke a pair on our Thanksgiving trip, and lost a pair - I expect they fell out of car door when we stopped at a rest area - on our Christmas trip, so I want to replenish my "stash" (and yes, I do keep a stash on hand - sunglasses are the only item I hoard). Will and I have the same size head though, so I suppose I could just borrow a pair of his…don't laugh if you see me sporting Batman sunglasses in the coming weeks.

Throw pillows. I also hoard throw pillows.

Needing
To get our broken window (into which Will threw a football) fixed, to combat the weeds taking over our grass and flower beds, and a date night with my husband. Tom and I tried to go out for three weekends in a row this month, but because of scheduling conflicts and babysitter unavailability we never made it beyond our living room couch. Then we tried to coordinate a lunch date, only to discover that the next day we both have free during the lunch hour falls in March. Dating is hard, y'all!

Thinking
About how I can continue working at Starbucks but spend less money and consume fewer calories there. Ideas? Please share.

Enjoying
The return of new episodes of my favorite television shows, my used-but-new-to-me bread machine, and my new phone (which I happened to list under the "Needing" category back in September). Tom worked late A LOT in January, so I spent many evenings watching episodes of The Blacklist and Chicago Fire, munching on freshly baked applesauce bread, and familiarizing myself with the features of my newest technological device.

Whew! Making it through January's life summary feels like a pretty massive accomplishment, one I look forward to repeating throughout 2014!

A Baffling Bowl Season

Yes, I'm talking about football again. I have a sickness.

Despite his solid grasp of the regular season, Will found "bowl season" football extremely confusing. You see, during the regular season, Tom and I define ourselves nearly as much by who we root against as we do who we root for. Basically, it doesn't matter which team Ohio State University plays against, when the Buckeyes take the field/court, we cheer whole-heartedly for their opponent. (I realize this style of fandom won't earn me any sportsmanship awards, but after a lifetime of strongly disliking Ohio State - and the Yankees, the Vikings, and the Bears - I simply can't wrap my head around supporting these teams during the regular season.)

Until bowl season rolls around, that is, at which point the overall success of the Big 10 compared to the the other NCAA conferences matters more than individual teams and specific games. And so as much as it pains us to do so, we swallow our pride and cross our fingers that Ohio State ends up on the podium…because their success = greater respect for the Big 10 conference. This concept troubled Will, which really just means we're raising him right: rooting for Ohio State should cause inner turmoil in a true Hawkeye fan.

Will also struggled to stay on top of sheer number of games taking place during such a short period of time - there were simply too many games to prepare for and too many teams to support. At one point he and Hallie changed their football-team-related clothing four times in 20 hours. (And then I did laundry for three days straight.)

Texas A&M Aggies

Iowa Hawkeyes

Nebraska Huskers

In the chaos of the day (the Hawkeye, Husker, and Badger games overlapped) I accidentally missed taking photos of the kids in their Wisconsin Badger gear, and because we forgot to bring our Michigan sweatshirts with us to Nebraska, we just wore maize and blue on the day the Wolverines were annihilated.

Yes, bowl season can be confusing when you support (and root against) as many teams as we do, but when you support as many teams as we do you're bound to end up a winner at least once or twice a year. Congrats Aggies and Huskers on your bowl victories, and better luck next year, Hawkeyes, Badgers, and Wolverines. 

And Ohio State. Each year I ask of you just one thing...I ask that if you're going to dominate the conference and beat all of my teams and do so in a way that always seems just a little bit unfair, you also win your bowl game so that our conference appears stronger. Way to let me - and the entire Big 10 - down this year, Buckeyes. 

The little voice in my head chants, "I can make it, I can make it, I can make it" as the little boy in my living room runs in circles and yells, "I LOVE FOOTBALL, I LOVE FOOTBALL, I LOVE FOOTBALL". Only one bowl game left...

High Five for Friday (1.24.14)

To be perfectly honest, I haven't done much "high-fiving" this week. The over-worked, anxious, and exhausted husband, the sick kiddo, and the cursed tooth forcing us to subject the other kiddo to unpleasantries like oral surgery and orthodontia have weighed heavily on me throughout the last seven days. On top of that, a number of people I love are struggling - in ways I can't fix - right now. My heart aches for my husband, my kids, and these wonderful friends and extended family members.

I've learned from experience, however, that I always feel much better when I "force" myself to find - and then share, via pictures and videos here on Chasing Roots - the good. So here are a few of the stories, photos, and videos that made my world seem a bit brighter this week. They all gave me a reason to look up.

1. Speaking of looking up, I simply adore these Up-inspired photos.

2. Happy cows may come from California, but the best cheese in the United States - according to the World Cheese Awards - still comes from Wisconsin. What I wouldn't give for an authentic Wisconsin cheese curd right now…

3. Just as Will inherited his cold weather and snow-related craziness from me, I inherited my cold weather and snow-related craziness from my dad…here he is, last weekend, carrying on the swimsuit snow angel tradition.

4. Because my sister's kiddos are still relatively young - Lily just turned three and Carter will be one next month - and not quite ready for swimsuit snow angels, she's had to exercise a bit more creativity in how she passes on these family traditions. When the Polar Vortex brought snow (and negative 15 degree temperatures) to their area of Illinois, Lily in particular couldn't believe her parents wouldn't allow her to romp around in that "fluffy white stuff". Sara and Jeff came up with a pretty awesome solution though…

Yep, that's multiple shovel-fulls of snow in the bathtub. Clearly the idea went over well with both kids, who spent as long as a three-year-old and a one-year-old can stay focused on anything building snowmen (you can see Olaf in the second picture) and eating snow.

Perhaps my favorite part of all this is the fact that Lily is wearing snow pants and mittens…and no shirt. Now there's a Midwestern girl.

5. And lastly, whenever I need a little cheering up I watch Saturday Night Live cast members break character. These clips never fail to drag a laugh out of me.

Happy Friday, friends!

Linking up with High Five for Friday!

The Kringle Kuties

The tradition began two years ago, when my sis-in-law Jenna, our friend Kelsey, and I headed out on Christmas Eve Eve to admire the Christmas lights on display in Lincoln, Nebraska. On that evening we found very few homes decorated in our taste, so when we returned home we created a friendly list of guidelines - a public service announcement of sorts - for decorating for and hanging Christmas lights during the holiday season and then I posted them here on the blog.

Jenna, Kelsey and I also decided that the next time the three of us ventured out on a Christmas light-seeing adventure, we'd do more than just critique Lincolnites' lighting skills…we decided we'd create awards and anonymously present them to the residents of the most beautifully decorated (according to our previously-established guidelines) homes throughout the city.

This Christmas brought the three of us back together (last year I didn't see Jenna and Kelsey during the holidays, so Tom and the kids helped me carry on the tradition here in College Station), and we followed through on our plan.

First, we created the awards. Hallie helped by sticking on the noses, mouths, and eyes, which is why some of the snowmen's faces are slightly askew. On the backs of the awards we wrote a cute little message about how much we enjoyed the home's Christmas lights, and then we signed each award from the "Kringle Kuties". Note to self: next year the Kringle Kuties should wear costumes.

Second, we drove through a number of neighborhoods throughout the city to establish a baseline and rule out neighborhoods to which there would be no need to return. This (the picture below), my friends, won't earn you an award from the Kringle Kuties. 

We never did figure out what that light configuration represented… 

Third, we returned to our favorite neighborhoods to select the award winners.

Lastly, we delivered the awards. In most cases, we simply drove up to the street-side mailbox and popped the award in with the recipient's mail. But in one older neighborhood, where the majority of the homes have front door mail slots rather than street-side mailboxes, Kelsey actually took the awards up to the houses and slid them through the mail slots. (The temperatures were in the single digits that night, which made getting out of the car over and over again lots of fun. I'm not sure how Kelsey earned that job…maybe she lost at Rock, Paper, Scissors?) On more than one occasion she could hear people on the other side of the door, people whom I'm sure were very surprised - hopefully pleasantly - to see a foam snowman congratulating them on their Christmas lights come shooting into their foyer.

I have always enjoyed the tradition of Christmas light-seeing, but doing so while spreading a little extra holiday cheer - in the form of a simple note to let people know how much we appreciated their efforts to spread Christmas spirit - made the experience even more enjoyable and memorable. I can't wait to let Will and Hallie in on the best part of all this next year.

Plus, if Will comes along I'll get of out having to run the awards to the front doors for the second year in a row...

To Dream, to Serve, and to Teach

50 years ago, while speaking to 250,000 Civil Rights supporters on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial, Martin Luther King Jr. made history.

"I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged on the color of their skin but on the content of their character." 

I dream the same dream for my children. I hope and pray they will always be evaluated by their words and actions, and that they in turn will always use words and actions to form opinions of others.

But I will also teach my children that while judging others according to skin color, religion, or sexuality can only hurt, recognizing the ways in which we differ from one another can actually unify us. We are all unique individuals, capable of contributing - albeit in very different ways - to the betterment of society. We are all worthy and deserving of respect and kindness from our fellow human beings, and our differences should be celebrated instead of ignored, or worse, used to justify discrimination.

Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day, my friends. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your unique and fascinating lives; your cultures, languages, religions, perspectives, lifestyles, and experiences have broadened my horizons and helped me become a more open-minded and compassionate person, and I hope to pass those characteristics along to my children.

MLK Jr. Day is considered a National Day of Service. If you have younger (preschool-aged) children, check out a few of the activities I compiled last year - word searches, coloring pages, and making paper peace doves and dream catchers - to help them begin to connect with this important service day.

MLK Jr. Day also marks the beginning of Youth Preparedness Week. If you have older (elementary- through high school-aged) children, visit the Red Cross blog for my suggestions on how youth and young adults can spend today - and the remainder of Youth Preparedness Week - serving and supporting their community's preparedness efforts.